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Showing posts from 2014

1 Am ....throwing in the towel

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        Small dog breed pup Sleep. I used to be able to sleep all night, with no interruptions. To quote the 1970's ish song - "Those were the days, my friend, we thought they'd never end..." But, end they have. And it isn't pretty. Last night was a perfect example of why I have bags large enough to carry a couch under my eyes. This is how it went...        1 Am... Sleeping soundly, which after a dialysis session, feels especially wonderful.        1:15 Am...I am jolted from sleep by the high pitched cry of a dog at the end of the bed. Adrenalin running, I bolt upright..saying What? What? Who was that? Annalee, our 100 pound, "small breed" dog leaps over my body, stepping on my bad ankle on her way off the bed in terror. I see Cliffy making his way around the end of the bed in the low light from the Christmas tree in the living room. "That was Biloxi..I stepped on her foot by accident trying to step over her." "Ohhh, ok" I sa

A "Nothing to do Day"..

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  Snowy day at Homeland Farm Well, it doesn't happen often, but today is one of those rare days where I have nothing to do. Nothing at all, and I am going to enjoy it. I am usually pretty busy around the house, and it is rare that I have everything caught up, but as it happens, this is one of those occasions.     Now, let me see..what can I do with all my relaxation time. I think I will maybe take a nap, and...ohh, wait.  I have to go wash up the dishes from last night. Be right back.     Ok, I am back. I just had to wash up the pots and pans from supper last night. SO..now what to do with all my free time. I could practice my crocheting, that Helen has been so kind to try and teach me. That sounds like a good "free time" activity. I have managed to learn how to....oh, hang on a minute. I have to go feed the pig his breakfast.      Ok, I am back. Robin Williams is a pot bellied pig living outside my kitchen door. I cook him a nice, hot breakfast every morning, a

Hello Santa, it's me Carmen...

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An early letter to Santa...         Dear Santy...                Well, it is a bit early for a letter I know, but I have had a little "incident", and it made it very clear what I should ask for this Christmas. As you are probably aware, I have bad knees, and while it would be really cool if you could give me two good knee joints, I know that isn't an option. Since the last three days have been pretty darn busy with Thanksgiving and all it's work, followed by a rousing dialysis session in which they tried desperately to suck off 2 bottles of champagne, I have been pretty much riding on my Rascal scooter all afternoon. That is how "the incident" occurred.               After my post dialysis nap, I hopped onto my scooter and cruised to the kitchen, granny nightie and all, trying to figure out a simple supper that did not involve turkey. (or champagne.) I rode here and there, mulled over a tuna fish sandwich...maybe eggs...nope. What I wanted was a nice sl

Ooopps! Sorry about that!

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      I like a speedy vehicle, I admit it. I imagine you are thinking I am talking about driving in a car. Nope, not a car. I am talking about driving in what we call a "go buggy". You know what I am talking about...Those motorized scooters they provide for us gimpy folks at most big box stores.       Since my knees have taken a turn for the worse, I have to ride on them if I am planning on shopping for more then 15 minutes at a time. If I don't ride, and am shopping for more then 15 minutes, my left leg goes numb due to the previous blood clots I had in that leg. Then my bad knees kick in, and I am miserable and in pain in no time. So now, a "go buggy" is a necessity for me.       At first, I hated using them in stores, but now I hate pain even more, so ride I do. Walmart usually has a good supply of them for people to use, and only once did I have to knock an old lady out of the way to get the last one. Kidding! I'm kidding, of course. Hannaford  has onl

Gonna be a long winter.....

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      As I walked through the living room this morning, carrying a basket of laundry, it occurred to me it is going to be a very, very long winter. Now you may think it is the thought of snow, or cold, or messy floors. If you have read some of my previous posts, you may even think it is because there will soon be buckets and buckets of horse mash lining my laundry room wall. All of the above reasons are true, but not the reason I had that dismal thought this morning.        The reason for my pessimism this morning was the fact that the simple act of walking past the pellet stove, set on a minimal ONE setting, carrying the partially filled laundry basket was enough to send me into a steaming, sweat on my brow HOT FLASH.         Yes sir, at the ripe old age of 51, I am apparently smack dab in the middle of what the older generations used to whisper about in hushed tones..."THE CHANGE." Now, I am not one to be all dramatic, and long for my youth, or whine about the wrinkles

T.G.I.T.F.T.I.N. (Thank God It's The First Tuesday In November)

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Politicians at the door       Finally. It is over. It is election day at last. Perhaps after tonight, we will be able to have a dinner without a call from Babs..(Barbara Bush), Ollie..(Olympia Snow) or Annie (Ann Lepage.) I am not sure if it is just me or not, but this election seems to have gone on for an eternity. I think I speak for all people, Reps or Dems, when I say Hallelujah! IT IS DONE. Let the best man, woman, or bear win. In honor of the end of the political assault (for awhile anyway..), a poem. AHEM....                                  Politics Schmolitics        It starts as early as January,        every other year..        the endless commercials, debates and phone calls,        I've learned to live in fear       Now it's not that I'm not a patriot,       or shrug off my civic duty,       but by the first Tuesday in November,       I am feeling pretty moody       He said, She said...       it goes on and on and on,       Who do you beli

Needed..(BADLY)..

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     My daughter is about to undertake the task of setting up a website for me, and has given me the difficult job of coming up with a catchy name. If you watch The Food Network at all, then you have undoubtedly seen the "Pioneer Woman." She is a blogger that also happened to be an excellent photographer and a great cook. She turned her blog into a multi-million dollar business, and Brogan told me I should do that. I said..why not. Okay. Here I go..     Photogenic Cliffy and Molly       Let's see. Ree Drummond, aka Pioneer Woman has a great eye for photography. The photos on her blog are positively breath taking. She lives on a ranch in Oklahoma with her handsome husband, photogenic kids and beautiful horses and animals. Well, I live on a farm in Maine, have a handsome Cliffy and sort of photogenic kids and animals. See...........    And now, photogenic Liam..umm..sort of...    Ok.. a VERY photogenic Cameron and Brogan..Hmmm Well, all I have to say

Where's Carmen? (been...)

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       I was totally shocked last week. I flipped on the computer, went to my blog page and found that I haven't blogged since March. Seriously. March.        I really can not believe it has been that long. I kept clicking the refresh button waiting for a newer post to pop up but no. The 2nd of March was indeed my last post. The fact that 7 months has gone by in seemingly the blink of an eye just makes me really believe that the old saying is true. Time does seem to go by faster the older you get, and this summer I have really felt all of my 51 years. So, let's recap the last 6 plus months of life here at Homeland Farm.         We had a long, long winter last year so when spring rolled around, I was very ready. I was glad to see the last of the frozen horse buckets and hoses leave my laundry room. Spring housecleaning was done (sort of) and then it was on to summer.         Ahh, summer in Maine. I wish I could say I swam everyday, or hiked and biked. Unfortunately though,

Winter of my discontent (ment)

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   Ok..It is official. I am truly, fully, exceptionally sick of winter. Now, I am not one to whine, (or wine, really) BUT! This seems to have been the longest.winter.ever. Can I get an AMEN?     Now, I am the first to say I hope we have a white Christmas, and actually I don't mind a "nip" in the air. After all, this is MAINE..LAND OF FOUR SEASONS. But this winter has pushed the limits of my patience. Let me count the 12 peeves of Winter.. 1. Spent all of Brogan's inheritance on pellets. 2. Spent all of Cameron's inheritance on firewood. 3. Spent all of Liam's inheritance on oil. 4. Lost all feeling in my fingers while in the barn digging in freezer, looking for something to eat. 5. Wonder why freezer is in barn anyway. 6. Sick of tripping over pails full of "beet pulp" and winter boots while trying to reach pantry shelves. 7. Tired of paying big bucks for veggies when I can grow my own in the sweet old summer time. 8. Tired of seeing a w

500 Channels and not a thing to watch..

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     My view from the dialysis chair, If I don't watch TV As many of you know, I have to do dialysis three times a week, which I am luck enough to be able to do at home. Three times a week, Brogan hooks me up to my home dialysis machine, and I sit for four plus hours while the machine cleans my blood and puts it back.       Now, I am not much of a television watcher, but that is what I do during those four hours. I commandeer the remote control, and settle in to watch television. Or should I say, I TRY to watch television. My gosh...we have a ton of channels, and my gosh..there is nothing on any of them. In case you aren't privy to "Direct TV", let me enlighten you as to my choices today.        I start out at channel 6, and work my way up to the upper 400's every time. It is a habit I can't seem to break. So, off we go!        I start out with a couple shows that sound breath taking.. "MOP SMARTER, NOT HARDER", or perhaps "UNDER $10 FR

I.N.S.O.M.N.I.A...FIND OUT WHAT IT MEANS TO ME!

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   No insomnia to be seen here Welcome to another episode of insomnia! We are so glad you are back. Our guest today is the lovely blog mistress Carmen C. Horton. She will now attempt to write a poem that rhymes despite the fact that it is the middle of the night! BUT FIRST! A word from our sponsor!      Tired of going to bed and waking up rested?      Sick of sleeping like the proverbial log?      Well, we have something that will eliminate that problem       with ease!       Try BLOAT-O FROZEN PIZZA!       With BLOAT-O, you can kiss your good nights sleep        GOODBYE! Try one slice for a night of mere tossing and       turning. Two slices will guarantee at least one hour of       awake time after midnight. But, if you try three slices,       you are guaranteed a FREE, YES FREE case of in-       digestion that will keep you awake for hours!        SO! Try BLOAT-O Today! Found in your grocery store's        frozen foods section. (Tucked in between frozen liver

Late Night Visitor

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Homeland Farm   As many of my blog readers know, we have had 5 generations of our family live here in this old farmhouse. Starting with my great grandmother Allie, it has been in our family for over 100 years. Many of my ancestors were born here, lived here and some even died here. Many as well, are buried in the back cemetery-Homeland Cemetery. Homeland Cemetery       Due to the long family history of this farm, my family believes that there have been many visitors from the beyond, and many of us have seen, heard or felt things that can not be "explained away". One of these experiences happened to me a couple nights ago.        I was sound asleep when I woke up with a pain in my hand. As I lay in bed trying to go back to sleep, I suddenly heard a man's voice coming from the room upstairs over my bed. My 13 year old son Liam sleeps in that room, and I thought "he is supposed to be asleep!" I wondered why he was still up and who he was talking to. Then

Up close and (too) personal

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We were in desperate need of a good fire starter, and I am nothing if not a women's liberation gal!    Just was looking for a specific photo in my albums, and I didn't find it. What I did find, however, were many photos that should never have seen the light of day. SO..why not bust them out. It's hump day..a day in need of a laugh to make it through the rest of the week. Have fun! Exhibit A.. I swear, a neck like that should only be seen on a football player..oh, and what is with that blonde 'fro? Exhibit B.. Who looks the most pathetic? A toss up.. Exhibit C.. Never mind the moustache...there are more whiskers on that chin then on the goats in the barn! MAAAAA!!! Exhibit D.. Even the horses run when they see me coming(esp while wearing a granny)..AND Exhibit E... Carrot Top? Is that you? So..another day ends at Homeland Farm, where self esteem goes to die.Tune in next week to see what sad looking creature will appear on my blog!

When a mud room is truly, a mud room

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   Happy New Year to one and all. I hope everyone had a great holiday night, and I hope we all have a healthy 2014. We are off to a wonderful start, and by wonderful, I mean we are having a snow storm. Oh, and bitter cold. Oh, and I mean wonderful in a very sarcastic way.      I spent the first two days of 2014 by doing what I do best...cooking and cleaning. Okay, I cook pretty well, but cleaning..not so much. It had to be done however, so I vacuumed, cleaned a few windows, ( Why do I have so many windows..just curious), and even dusted a bit. When I say 'dusted a bit', that means I pulled the sleeve of my sweater down over my hand, and did the worst spots. Then had to change, as one arm was really pretty dirty.     I always start in the end of the house and work my way out to the kitchen, and finish in the laundry room, or as some people call it..the mud room. I have seen many so called mud rooms in all the house wife magazines I get and they are always so tidy. I mean, they