|No insomnia to be seen here|
Tired of going to bed and waking up rested?
Sick of sleeping like the proverbial log?
Well, we have something that will eliminate that problem
Try BLOAT-O FROZEN PIZZA!
With BLOAT-O, you can kiss your good nights sleep
GOODBYE! Try one slice for a night of mere tossing and
turning. Two slices will guarantee at least one hour of
awake time after midnight. But, if you try three slices,
you are guaranteed a FREE, YES FREE case of in-
digestion that will keep you awake for hours!
SO! Try BLOAT-O Today! Found in your grocery store's
frozen foods section. (Tucked in between frozen liver and
old french fries.) Now, back to our show!
Welcome back to INSOMNIA, America! Now competing
for our middle of the night poem medal is Carmen Poe
Horton. Can we have quiet from the audience please!
you are such a hag to me,
you drive me up a tree
I'm churning and
and desperate to sleep,
I guess I better get up,
I think I might just weep.
I guess you're here to stay,
you wouldn't have it any other way
Poor Cliffy is affected,
he is bothered half the night
He wishes he could kick me out
I think he really might
Time for you to go
why don't you make like the wind and blow
The End. (Says the chick in the granny nightgown with bags under her eyes.)
OH SO CLOSE! The judges say that it does rhyme, but it is a lousy poem so you lose. (Awwww..says the audience of three dogs.)
We do have a lovely parting gift for you, Ms Horton. Show her what her gift is!
Your gift today is a ONE YEAR SUPPLY OF BLOAT-O PIZZA! Cases and cases of Extra Crispy, Extra greasy, and the perpetual favorite..Extra Indigestion! Enjoy!
(limp applause from audience of dogs on couch.) (Light from computer is bothering them..they say go back to bed!)
GOOD NIGHT AMERICA, AND TUNE IN NEXT TIME TO I.N.S.O.M.N.I.A., FIND OUT WHAT IT MEANS TO ME!