Homeland Farm

Homeland Farm

Saturday, March 2, 2013

Bathed in "Everlasting Sunshine"

    I had an interesting trip to the pharmacy the other day..Well, I thought I was in the pharmacy. By the time I got out of the aisle 5, I wasn't sure if I was in the grocery store, a local bar, or on vacation. Let me explain.
    I was in need of a fresh bottle of body wash, so I moseyed into the local pharmacy, found my aisle and then, got lost. Well, I wasn't really lost, but it felt like it. I stood in front of the vast array of bottles, and was overwhelmed.
     First of all, do we really need row after row of choices? I remember having a choice of "Ivory" or "Zest". Now, I had so many choices I almost forgot what I went in for by the time I left. A bottle in every size, shape and color stared back at me from the vast rows of liquid soap. Then, came the names. This is where it went crazy.
      I really wasn't sure what I should do with most of them. Somehow bathing with them seemed all wrong. I actually had the makings of a great muffin recipe right in front of my nose.
Lets see..Mix up "Oatmeal and Shea butter", add "Milk and Honey",one tsp of "Heavenly Vanilla", throw in some "Coconut Apricot" and "Fruit Peel", and bake at 350 degrees for 15 minutes. Wash it down with a cool glass of "Coconut Water" and you could have quite a snack!
      Better yet, if you have a bottle of rum, you are in for an afternoon of tropical adult beverages, let me tell you. Lets see..Mix a shot of rum, with a  slug of "Tangerine Guava", and a belt of "Citrus Splash", and garnish with "Sweet Pea" and you have one refreshing drink! Of course, you could go with three fingers of vodka, and fill with either "Pomegranate Tangerine" or "Mango Splash"..YUM YUM!
        If you don't feel like a "mixed " beverage, just pour yourself a wine glass of  "Vino Moisture", made with crushed grapes. It is supposed to moisturize your skin, if you don't mind that lovely reddish/purple hue you get from using crushed grapes for soap.
        I think any of these lovely drinks will indeed make you feel all warm and fuzzy..almost like you are on vacation. You remember that old phrase.." Calgon, take me away" ? Well, apparently these soaps actually tell you where they are taking you. "Tahiti Sunset" anyone? or perhaps "Fiji? "Hawaiian Tropic" sure sounds good to this Mainer.
         I decided I wanted a non fruit or vegetable soap. My final choices? After much consideration, I had it narrowed down to the following five. "Evenly Gorgeous" sounded good, as I didn't want one part of my anatomy more gorgeous then the other parts of me. But then, "Passionate Spell"..wow, who doesn't want more passion and I'd love to be able to cast a spell. "Tempting Whisper" sounded interesting, but I wasn't sure what I was going to be tempted to do...Maybe eat that whole bag of "M and M's " in my basket? Hmm..better not take a chance with that one. "Everlasting Sunshine" sounded pretty good as it has been a long, dark snowy month. Sure beats the heck out of "Snowy, Grey and Cold" body wash. I made that one up, by the way. The others are legit names.
         I remembered that diamonds are a girls best friends, so I thought I would choose " Diamond Powder and Calla Lilies", as it is supposed to "moisturize and illuminate" the ole hide. Who doesn't want to be illuminated by bath soap.
         "Look Vance! The Calla Lilies are in bloom again." Sorry, had to throw that Pee Wee Herman reference in there. I think Calla Lilies are a popular funeral/grave flower. Not sure I want to bathe in that after all. Just the "Diamond Powder" would be sparkly and wonderful though. But maybe a bit too much like glitter.
         So, after 35 minutes of careful consideration, I chose "Everlasting Sunshine." I just wonder if I will need sunglasses in the shower...
Not Calla, but Tiger Lilies

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